Play Nice and Be Polite

Ok, ok, so I realize my engagement isn't official-OFFICIAL yet, as in I don't have a ring on my finger yet. But I don't need my ring (yet) to know I will spend the rest of my wonderful life with the most perfect man on the planet -- most perfect for me, that is. And that is all I need to know. We've made plans and we're on the same page. The ring is a beautiful symbol...but it's just a stand-in for the real thing (that thing we have, called Love). I realized I had begun to undermine what we know in our hearts "until I get my ring." I also know I wouldn't have him any other way than just the way he is. Practical. Pragmatic. Frugal. Calcuated and Reasonable --- everything I'm not!! Which is why he can take his sweet time and surprise me. Everyone else will just have to realize that the ring is merely a small detail of the whole process of getting married. In the meantime, I'll be wedding blogging and DIY-ing. Thankyouverymuch.

And that brings me to my main point of this soapbox post: Polite Courtesy. Or better yet, Genuine Appreciation. The Thank You card. A grueling task for any newlywed, new parent or new graduate. But it really shouldn't be a task should it? The thank you card should be the least we can do for the generosity someone has given us. I read a great post today by
Offbeat Bride in which she words it well:

Yes, it's courteous. Yes, it's a way of showing how much you truly appreciate people's generosity. We all know these things and honestly, they should be enough to motivate each of us to carve out a couple nights to sit down with the new spouse and get to work on some cards.

Then there's the issue of what constitutes a "gift." Did your 15-year-old cousin help you with your iPod playlist? That's a gift. Send 'em a card. Did your college friend give you a blender, but then also spend half the reception tending after your vomiting drunk uncle? Send 'em a card, and acknowledge BOTH gifts. Did your coworker who wasn't invited to your family-only destination wedding help you surreptitiously print out programs on the office printer? Send 'em a card. When in doubt, anyone made your wedding planning easier or smiled at you when you were freaking out? Send 'em a card.




Can I just say that I went to a wedding 4 months ago for a friend I hadn't seen in almost 10 years, traveled pretty far, and spent way more money than I had at the time on a gift, AND made a great effort to close the gap (of 10 years!) at a bachlorette....AND... I never got a thank you card? It's not that big a deal; I'm sure she appreciated the gesture and I bet she is very busy. At the same time, it just doesn't seem quite polite.

My goal: to make thank you cards less of a chore and more of a pleasant way to notate the nice things people do for you.


I think the cutesy whimsy of Red Cap Cards should help motivate just about any reluctant thank you card writer!